Do no harm!

It’s past 3 in the morning and I can’t sleep!

The rest of the house is blissfully unaware that I have crept into my office and opened my laptop in the hope that processing my thoughts might help me get some rest.

I was hurt today.

Forgiveness has taken place, grace has been applied to the situation, but the wound hasn’t healed yet and it may take a little while.

At the moment it happened, I wanted to retaliate, to say things I would regret and make the other person hurt as much as I was.

From the beginning of this journey, I made my choice to apply the characteristics of the Proverbs 31 wife not only to my marriage but to my everyday life. Today it was a challenge. Choosing to “do no harm” in the middle of a painful situation can take every ounce of self-control and discipline we have. I immediately turned the hurt over to God and asked Him (repeatedly) to help me keep my mouth shut.

I remember having a conversation with my Dad when I was in my twenties. I had made a decision that I knew had deeply disappointed him. When I asked his opinion he said, “I’d rather not talk about it now as I am upset and I may feel differently about it in the future. I don’t want to say something that I regret.” My Dad showed such self-control at that moment. Rather than risking his relationship with his daughter, he applied wisdom to the situation and decided that “doing no harm” was the best way forward. I wasn’t quite as successful as my Dad today but God helped me to show a level of self-control that I haven’t managed for a long while.

In the run-up to lent I focused each day on a different verse linked to wisdom and they came flooding back today.

“Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult.”

Proverbs 12:16


“Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin.”

Proverbs 13:13


“Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.”

Proverbs 14:29

In those moments today, I was grateful for the scriptures that had been stored away ready to apply to a situation like this. Was my response perfect? No! But I can honestly say that I tried to express my hurt in a way that aimed to provide a way forward rather than harm the other person involved.

Aiming to live a Proverbs 31 life is already making a difference!

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